The Dim Daft Dwarves

An extract

Whenever stardust gets a chance to wrap itself around a witch,  it binds her tight and sends her whizzing through the void to the land of Krall.   That is what happened to Griselda.   When the box of stardust landed in the magic cauldron, the explosion sent stardust all over Griselda.   It wrapped itself around her, bound her tight and with a strange whistling sound sent her whizzing through the void.   She would have screamed but her dress swirled up (revealing a pair of ancient bloomers) and stuffed itself inside her mouth.

She landed in a muddy bog which sucked her down and down, her feet disappearing, then her calves.  "Help! Help!" she cried.  The words echoed through the distant night, but there came no help.   Her knees disappeared, then her thighs.

"Those damned dwarves!" Griselda cursed, in her fury reaching up and grasping the branch of a dead tree which stood gaunt beside the bog.

"Damn those dwarves!" she cursed again.  Her fury gave her strength and she pulled upon the branch, screamed and pulled again.  Slowly her thighs and calves emerged from the bog. With a burp her feet shot from the clinging mud, leaving her bedraggled body dangling from the branch.

"Those damned dwarves!" Griselda gasped, as she pulled her body up into the tree, climbed along the branch and fell exhausted to solid earth.

The land of Krall is a place of shadows ruled by the night.  There are three moons.  No sun ever shines.  Volcanoes belch liquid fire into the night sky.  Mud oozes.  Beasts howl and curse the night. 

          For a witch brought up in the south of England it was a shock.   Griselda was not pleased at all. "When I get home I shall chop those dim daft dwarves into little bits and feed them to the crows."  Griselda would have said more but at that moment three witches rushed past screaming, "Run! Run!   The giants come!"

          It was the annual witch hunt.   Giants (toymakers from the neighbouring planet of Aaron) had come to replenish their stock of witches for their children's toys. Against the sky were huge figures, carrying nets and jars and sounding hunting horns. 
Griselda tried to run but was too slow.   A net swished down and scooped her up. "Got one!" grunted the giant as he placed a huge clammy hand in the net and picked Griselda up between finger and thumb.   She screamed and cursed.   "She's really ugly!   The children will love her!" the giant enthused as he dropped Griselda in a storage jar and sealed the lid.

          "They will not!" Griselda shrieked as she hammered on the jar.   She tried to remember the spell for turning giants into newts but failed.   The giant laughed and lifting the lid dropped in a capsule of sleeping gas.   Griselda fell asleep.

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